Teen Mom Bios: Maci | Farrah | Catelynn | Amber | Leah | Chelsea | Kailyn | Jenelle Teen Mom Junkies


Well, this wasn’t a headline that I thought I would be writing, but I guess some things still surprise me.

Gary Shirley, one of three dads featured on the original Teen Mom series, is reportedly expecting a second child with girlfriend of a couple years, Kristina.  According to In Touch, Gary told Amber that his girlfriend was pregnant with his child about a month ago, and although nobody has publicly confirmed it yet, Gary’s sent some cryptic Tweets that might cause some people to think that these rumors are true.  The first tweet, shared on September 15 read, “I don’t wanna sleep! Lol! (Gonna rub the bun in the oven) :)” but nobody really thought much of it at that point and people blew it off like it wasn’t a big deal.


Now that the headlines are popping up, it’ll be interesting to see what Gary has to say about all of this.  So far, neither Amber nor Gary have commented on the possibility of a second child, but we’ll be sure to keep you posted when more information surfaces.

Since Amber Portwood’s release from prison in November, she’s kept relatively quiet regarding her personal life, which I would say is a smart thing to do.  She has stayed away from social media accounts, and seems to be doing much better than she was when we saw her on Teen Mom.  She did appear on Dr. Phil last month, where she talked about her struggles to get sober before her prison time, as well as being high on nearly every episode of Teen Mom that we watched.

Gary, however, still has a very active Twitter account, and he shared some promising news with us a couple of days ago.  He said that he and Amber were going to take their daughter, Leah, to see Disney on Ice.  Leah, who spent 17 months without her mother, would benefit from having some family time with both parents around, and I was glad to see that Gary wasn’t trying to keep Amber and Leah apart.  Gary even shared the following picture with us:


Gary has had full custody of Leah since December 2011, and he says that for now, that’s the way it will remain.  Many people were wondering if Amber would regain custody after she was released from jail, but Gary states that he knows how possible it is for Amber to relapse with the drugs, so he doesn’t want to put his daughter in a situation that could potentially harm her.  Gary admits that since Amber has been out of prison, she has Leah in mind more, but that Amber needs to accept Leah at the age she is now, instead of thinking about the age she was when Amber was put in prison.

Hopefully these two can keep up the good work in order to eventually create a stable co-parenting situation for little Leah.  We’ve witnessed their ups and downs, but as long as both of them have Leah’s best interest in mind, they should be able to figure things out.

(note, this is an obvious photoshop job, so don’t get worked up)

It would come as a surprise to pretty much nobody if I told you that Gary is pretty douchey, or at least he comes off that way on any media outlet he’s been on (especially twitter).  That being said, I find it hilarious that some media outlets are acting like Gary dating Leah’s babysitter is some scandal.  The National Enquirer “broke” this story and loved adding the dramatic flare to it.  Some other sites ran with it and bashed him for hooking up behind Amber’s back.

What’s this behind the back crap?  Because she doesn’t know about it yet?  Of course she doesn’t, because she chose to spend the next 5 years in jail.  Anyway, let’s just pretend that Amber and Gary were an actual couple when she went to prison, I thought being allowed to hook up was an unwritten rule about prison. Isn’t that a thing?  I’ve watched a ton of those lockup shows, and many guys in there tend to just bury their head in the sand regarding that unwritten rule.  As long as she comes and visits him once a week, he’ll pretend she’s not hooking up with his best friend.

Then when you factor in Amber as the one in prison, well it’s really hard to blame Gary here.  Let’s not pretend here, both are absolutely horrible for each other and anyone watching the show has known that for years.  He treats her like crap, she treats him like crap, and without Leah keeping them in touch (and the money from MTV), they probably would have gone their separate ways a long, long time ago.  According to ‘Hollybaby’, Amber’s brother is furious about the news, but come on.  Switch roles and put Gary in prison for 5 years, does anyone in their right mind think Amber would be faithful?  She’d be hooking up with the first former felon she met at Wal-Mart before Gary was assigned a cell.

They all made it into my Friday “catch-all” post!

It’s that time again, everyone!  The time for a random Friday post where I compile things that have been happening in Twitter World that don’t really need full posts of their own.

First of all, Jenelle insists she’s trying to get Jace back, despite the fact that everyone is ready to lynch her.  She tweeted a picture of his room at her house:

Jaces bedroom :) I’m trying everyone. I’m going to get him back !

I want a race car bed!

I will probably always hold out hope that she does get him back, but can she stay out of trouble long enough to really try?  I guess only time will tell.

If there is one thing I never want to hear about, it’s Gary Shirley’s feet.  However, he tweeted that he has planter warts and now my life will never be the same:

Who knows anything about planter warts?

I had 1. cost 8 grand for surgery now I have 4 and I’ve been putting medicine on them and idk if they’re getting better ugh…

I’m pretty sure Gary is the king of TMI.  He also tweeted:

cum pee on my wart.


I’ll be in Las Vegas the 12th so get your plunger ready.

Anyone who is going to be in Las Vegas this month, watch out.  Gary appears to be looking for a bathroom and it isn’t going to be pretty.

The big news here is Maci’s annual “Bookout Cookout.”  I have decided that I’m really sad my last name doesn’t rhyme with anything.  My maiden name rhymes with “pillow,” but that’s not as awesome as rhyming with “cookout.”  Anyway, Maci and family celebrated the 4th in style.  She tweeted a picture of her brother, whom we know way too little about, since he refuses to be filmed for Teen Mom.

I love that he’s wearing a Hooters shirt.

According to Radaronline, Maci was living it up at the party, drinking like a rockstar.  Maci, who turns 21 next month, tweeted her future plans:

I really want to be a bartender. not at a club but somewhere cool. i feel like id be so good at it. hm?

I wonder what “somewhere cool” to Maci would be.  A seedy bar?  A country club?  I kind of wish she specified.  As far as the drinking goes: Maci, Maci, Maci…if you’re going to drink underage, don’t allow anyone to take pictures of you.

And, finally, since I’m so giving, I leave you with an adorable picture of Bentley wearing really huge glasses.


gary shirley food stamps

Does this look like the face of a guy struggling to eat?

It appears Teen Mom gossip is all the rage with the tabloids, and some just scoop up any story they can and run with it.  The latest is that someone told Reality Weekly that Gary Shirley (aka Gary Time) is broke as a joke and is getting food stamps.  While I didn’t read the article, Hollywood Life did and they summarized for me (because I’m too cheap to buy it)

The report is saying that Gary Time is blowing through his money like Pacman Jones on a typical weekend. He buys cars, flat screen tv’s, lap dances, and plenty of food.  In fact, the report is saying that he’s a food addict and he uses the food stamps to buy Twinkies.

Well, Gary took to twitter to defend himself, as it’s only fair, and here is his response:

-Not that there’s anything wrong with Food Stamps I don’t have any. Whatever “friend” sold this story just sells me out for Lil but of $
-I take care of my kid and the friends that have sold the stories I know which ones I don’t associate w them so they make dumb stuff up.

I’m torn on the story… I mean following Teen Mom, it’s very clear Gary does spend on things like cars and such.  That much is known.  However, this still is Reality Weekly, and while they generally get Leah stories pretty accurate (thanks to the direct line to Jeremy imo), I don’t think it would be that hard to convince them to run this story.  He’s a big guy, so the food addiction is plausible, and there have been multiple reports that he likes to have good times at stripper clubs, etc.

But, I’m going to go with my gut on this one.  I think Gary is correct and it’s just a fake story sold to the magazine. Corrina, an excellent writer for Gather, brings up a good point about the issue.   I don’t think you can just walk into the local food stamp office and tell them you’re poor and you get money.  You do need to show at least some proof of that.  While Gary is unemployed, I’m sure showing 6 figures on last year’s tax return is probably not going to go a long way in getting him aid.  I’m no expert on how the offices work, or how his tax returns look, but it’s very doubtful.

I’m calling this story bogus.  Thoughts?

maci talking about ryan's girlfriend dalis

I have to admit, I’m in over my head right now.  Melinda is in Florida on a much needed vacation, so that leaves me to handle both live tweets and recaps for this episode and next.  Honestly, I’ve written exactly 0 recaps for Teen Mom, as my full time job is basically to keep track of Jenelle’s constantly changing relationship status.  I’ll give it a go, but I doubt it will be as good.

Let’s start with everyone’s favorite – Amber….


Amber is still in the very beautiful rehab facility, most likely paid for by MTV.  They don’t really show much of her because when they do, she’s clearly so drugged up she can barely keep her eyes open.  What little of the Amber segment focused on Gary’s preparations to visit her at some point, and a few third parties mentioning just how bad those two are for each other.

Gary’s mother chatted with him for a little while about her rehab, and reading between the lines she was basically telling him.. “Look Gary.. or should I call you Gary Time and buy a t-shirt so you actually listen to me?  Amber has issues.. the type that a little stint in rehab isn’t going to magically fix.  While that place does wonders for people on the show Intervention, it simply can’t fix crazy”.   Naturally, Gary was in Gary world and didn’t really care what his mother had to say.

On Amber’s side, some creepy looking guy named JJ had Amber call her brother Shawn to talk about how things are going.  While others may have sugar-coated Amber’s relationship at times, Shawn didn’t.  He was very blunt and direct calling the relationship toxic, and saying Gary is controlling and essentially ruining her life.  Like the efforts put forth by Gary’s mom, it was another wasted attempt because Amber was off in Amber world while Shawn was talking.

The segment ended with Gary letting Amber know that he’s going to be bringing Leah out to see her, and they’re going to have some Gary and Amber time (I don’t even want to picture that)


It’s graduation time!  And you know what that means??  Awkwardness!  Why?  Well, for starters, Tyler’s already in college, so I really don’t know what’s up with that.  If I recall, he finished high school a semester early and was able to begin college classes, but that made for any time they talked about the ‘next step’ kind of weird.  He’s already on the next step.

Minor nitpicking aside, it was still a great time for Tyler, but especially for Catelynn.  Her father – Dave (who is moving near her) – was able to make it up for the graduation with her brother who’s sadly paralyzed from an auto accident.  This is great for Cate because Dave is really one cool guy and she seems to really lean on him for support.  The fact that he’s moving up is making it that much better.

Tyler, well, he’s still stuck with Butch and his issues.  Butch is not able to make it to the graduation because he’s getting out of jail one day too late. Look on the bright side though, he’s really coming around!!  He’s actually starting to accept Carly… very nice of him  (*rolls eyes*)

Regardless, congratulations on the graduation you two!

Maci Bookout

Maci, Maci, Maci.. what am I going to do with you?  Her part revolves around Bentley going to FL for the week with Ryan, his parents, and Ryan’s girlfriend Dalis (whom Maci was unaware of at the time).  Well, Maci decided to invite herself down to their family vacation.  Not to intrude, just to “be there if needed”.  Talk about awkward, and then with Dalis coming along, how uncomfortable for this poor girl?

But hey, at least she disguised her intrusion by bringing along some friends so they can all sit around and talk about Ryan and his girlfriend.   Does anyone get the feeling that Maci secretly wants Ryan back real bad but is trying to be very un-Chelsealike about it?

Farrah Abraham

This was essentially the Farrah episode, so I saved the best for last.  First, you have Michael (her father) helping her get comfortable with her new surroundings in Florida, while Farrah does her constant eye rolling any time he tries to give her an ounce of advice.  She took it personal when he said he was thinking of moving down there so he can help her out if needed.  Yes, I get that both he and Deb are being overbearing helicopter grandparents to Sophia, but many single moms would kill for that type of support.  Yet here you have Farrah constantly yelling back at her mother and father whenever they try to help… grr frustrating.

Farrah then decides to interview for a nanny because apparently she needs help with Sophia, but not free help from caring grandparents.  Then, only after she’s all moved in, she does a check on her potential nanny only to find out Farrah is the one kind of living in the crappy neighborhood.  Well done on the pre-move research there.

Finally, we have the dog situation.  Because Farrah learned that she really can’t handle having a dog, she went to her pet shop to pick out a fish.  Of course she doesn’t make it past the dog section before asking to see one of the cute puppies, and instantly falls in love with it.  Showing some restraint and maturity, she puts the puppy back and picks out the fish that Sophia want and they go home.  Hahahah.. just kidding.  This is Farrah.  Ignoring Sophia’s plea for a fish, and the fact that she pretty much sucks as a dog owner, she buys it anyway.   But hey, at least it’s not wearing diapers this time, it’s only trapped in a cage a hamster would feel claustrophobic in.

In conclusion, that’s my recap.  I don’t really know how to end these things when they’re separated into four different parts, so I’m just going to stop typing and let you guys talk about the episode now